13 Months

So, I have to admit something. Corey and I both missed Brigz's 13 month birthday. We are horrible parents. This past month has been the craziest month since before the baby came. I forgot how crazy summers usually are. Last summer, we had just had Brigz and we were home a lot. Today is the first day that I have been able to semi-relax at home and not have to stress about up coming trips or events. We have been out of town for 3 of the four weekends in August. We have been living out of bags. I can't complain though because soon enough it is going to be freezing and I will probably be snowed in and begging the weather to let me leave.

I also have bronchitis right now. I haven't ever had it before. I know it effects everyone differently. I went to the hospital because I couldn't catch my breath. I felt like I was having really bad asthma. No other symptoms at all. Weird. I am on an antibiotic, so hopefully I will be able to breathe normal again soon. I really feel for people with asthma. My mom is a sever asthmatic and never has full air flow through her bronchioles. That would stink because it is really scary to not be able to breathe.

I also had a bizarre thing happen. I had a "false positive" pregnancy test. They aren't supposed to happen, but sure enough, I guess they do. I spent a day thinking I was pregnant. At first, I almost had a heart attack, but by the end of the day, I was super excited and planning how to surprise Corey. I took extra tests over a few days time to make sure I was and they all came back negative. I called my doctor and they said to wait and take more, which I did. All negative. I didn't realize how depressing it would be. I have been having a hard time with it and am very emotional. It is best for timing that I am not right now, but it still makes me sad. I'll get over it though.

Yes, our little man is over a year old. Holy cow. In the past month, he has morphed into a completely different child. He is so easy now! (knock on wood) He is silly, so sweet, and so funny! Corey and I just laugh at him when us three are together because he is always into something or doing something funny. Here are the stats on Brigz:

• He is still below the 19 lb mark and thanks to getting sick again this month, won't be for a while now.
• He is in 12 month clothes.
• He wants to be outside. all. the. time. He says "ow-shy" when he wants to go out. which is constantly. He points at the windows and doors and cries to go outside. I love being outside, so I don't mind.
• He is 100% content if he is in his stroller no matter where we are.
• He is a little piggy now. I have realized that it is all a texture thing for him. He likes to bite things that are crunchy (tomatoes, finger foods, crackers), and eat things off a spoon that are cold and sweet (yogurt, apple sauce).
• He wants to feed himself with a spoon or fork. He does a pretty good job!
• He has figured out the difference in a milk and a water sippy cup. When he asks for his "baba" I give him water first, and he will keep saying "baba" until I give him his milk cup. Since he was sick, he has started going even further and says "baba" until he gets his binky. I try to only give it at naps and bedtime still, but man, he can be very persistant!
• He points at everything. If it is food, he will point at it and then put it in his mouth and say "mmm". Sometimes he does this to things that are not food... not good.
• He still has a minor fear of large animals that get too close to him.
• Sometimes when he walks, he throws his arms behind him and does a funny face. He looks like superman.
• He has a super thick head of blond hair. Corey says we can't cut it because it would take two pounds off of him. He has the most amazing bed head I have ever seen!
• He takes two 1-2 hour naps a day which are wonderful. He goes to bed at night around 8 and wakes up at 6:30. I pull him into bed with me and then he sleeps til 9. I hope he doesn't grow out of this any time soon! I love waking up to his smiley face!
• He makes the sound of lots of animals now. His favorites are ducks. He says "Duck, Quack, Quack". He always barks and moos, well he says "booo boo".
• He shows us his teeth with a big cheesy grin
• He is very ticklish
• He hides all over teh house. I find him by asking "where is Brigz?" and I follow the giggles. He is usually slouched down pretending I can't see him
• He gives really good hi fives and says "yeah" afterwords.
• He LOVES books. He brings them to you and then sits in your lap to read them. We have yet to make it through a whole book, but he likes turning the pages.
• He says "go", "there", "that" and "wowww" constantly.
• He loves chocolate.
• He hates to be by himself, although he has been getting a lot better. He plays by himself now which makes it easier to get some things done.
• He still loves to bite.
• He has started testing his disipline lately. He knows when he is doing something bad and looks at you while he does it. He has gotten a few little butt swats.
• He is the best thing ever. I am so lucky to get to spend my days with him. He is sooo loveable and gives kisses and hugs constantly. He wants to cuddle all the time.

I am so lucky that Corey works hard so I can stay home with him every day but Wednesday. God has blessed our family so much and I am so grateful for his love.

To Granny's House We Go

We just got back from a trip to South Texas. Brookshire/ Wallace area to be exact. I have to say it is the most prime example of a bittersweet trip I have ever had. We went down for my Granny's 90th birthday celebration.  It was bittersweet because she has alzheimers and doesn't really know us as who we are now. My dad considers her house "the last peice of his childhood" left and I love going there. It was great because I was able to visit with so much family that I don't usually get to.

My dad calls her house home. He spent summers in the area between my Granny's house and my Grandma Bear's house. They are about a half an hour apart. My Granny owns acres of farmland that my Grandfather ran cattle and grew watermelons on. He has unfortunately been gone for 16 years, but my dad talks about him like he is still here. I wish I could meet him one more time to see all the features about him that my dad remembers. He always talks about his big ol' hands and his smile. He was so kind to my dad and taught him so many things about hard work and integrity. My Grandma Bear is on the other side of the family and she passed away in 2009. Her little home in Wallace was sold last year and it killed my dad. Now my Granny's house is the only place that he has that he has memories of from when he was a child.

When my dad is in south Texas, he is more himself more than any other time or place. We, unfortunately, have never spent a ton of time there. It is a long distance to drive, and flights were too expensive when we were young.  The memories I have from South Texas are so strong. I can close my eyes at any point and smell my Granny's house. I know exactly how it looks and is laid out. I can picture all the faces of the family. I can here the funny little songs my Granny sang to us. I feel the hugs of my Aunt Randy. It is a place that also feels like my home as well. However, we have family members that I know little about. I have heard the stories from my dad, but have little stories of my own.

My Granny is a tough, proud, sweet and sincere Texas Woman. She has done things herself and is a very hard working lady. She also knows how to have fun. There are so many stories of her saying and doing funny things. She has been known to take her clothes off and fly down a slip n' slide at almost fifty. She is your finest dominoes player. She can shoot a gun better than any man. Now, at age 90, her memory is sharper than a tack from about 15 years ago and before.She had a hard time recognizing my dad because his hair is darker than she remembers and he has facial hair.  She has no idea who I am. She remembers who "Abbey" is, but I'm pretty sure that it is the five year old me. The me that she went camping with and sung songs to. She saw me and thought I was just a really tall girl that was growing too fast and "needed a brick put on my head".  She definately didn't know who Corey was even though she had met him a few times and even came to our wedding. She knew Brigz must have belonged to my dad somehow since he has white hair and blue eyes and didn't stop moving.

This trip was  hard for me because of my dad. South Texas looks nothing like what is does in his memories right now. It is so brown from the draught. My Granny's house is dusty and doesn't have any cows on it. My Granny looks great, but it all just isn't the same. The roads are paved, there are new homes, it is all just different. Yet so the same. My dad was able to eat blackberry pie, homemade ice cream, brisket, sausage, gumbo... all the things that he has talked about. We were all able to hang out with family. I loved getting to visit with fellow Kocureks, how my cousin Zach looks like my dad when he was younger, and getting to hear all the stories of my dad cruising around and causing trouble in that same very place.

It was a trip I will never forget. As we left, I cried my eyes out. It was amazing getting to soak up all the family I could. It was terrible saying goodbye. I don't know what will happen in the near future. I'm not so sure I want to know. I hope my dad's memories can always be preserved. I hope things will remain somewhat the same. God has such huge plans for all of us. Sometimes I wonder where he comes up with these ideas, but they always work out in the end!

Someone to Share My Oreos With

There is nothing in life that I love doing more than hanging out with my boys. Now that we have this little halarious, silly creature, Corey and I are appreciating the little things more in life. One big thing that I love is....

that I have someone to share my Oreos with :) (and nutella and ice cream, which he also loves)